Let Them Talk First

Let Them Talk First

Let them talk first

                When meeting and networking with new people, one of the things that’s pretty effective during the communication is to let the other person talk first. After the greetings and introductions, let the person you have just met talk first. You can do this by asking them a question about where they are from, what they do for a living, what brought them to the networking event, etc. Allowing the other person to talk first is a way to immediately establish trust because you are taking the time to listen to what that person has to say. People, in general, love to talk about themselves and share what’s going on their lives so let them talk. Moreover, if being in networking situations freaks you out a little bit, this is also a way for you to take some of the pressure off yourself!

               I will caution against drilling a person you just met with questions so much so that they can’t get a word in to ask you anything about yourself. I have been in plenty of networking situations in which I felt like I was being interrogated because of question after question they were throwing at me.

Remember, allowing the other person to talk about themselves first and drilling them with questions are two different things!

What other tips do you have for effective networking??

Dr. Carmen April's Speaker Series

Dr. Carmen April’s Speaker Series

 

              Dr. Carmen April is a young entrepreneur and community leader recognized as a 2014 Nashville Emerging Leader Award (NELA) Winner, a 2013 Nashville Business Journal Top 40 Under Forty Award Recipient and is a 2014 Graduate of the New Leaders Council Institute – Nashville Chapter.  Dr. April is available for speaking engagements on Leadership for College Students and Young Professionals.

You can follow her daily #Leadership insights on Twitter @DrCarmenApril

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How NOT to Undercut Your Suggestion Before You Even Give It!

How NOT to Undercut Your Suggestion Before You Even

Give It!

Leadership Opinions

                  I’ve seen what I’m discussing here today happen all too often and it involves beginning suggestions like this –>  “I don’t know if this will be a good idea or not, but………”. The mere fact that this statement started off with a negative tone pretty much sets up the rest of the statement for failure! Phrasing a statement like this sends a message that you lack confidence in what you are preparing to say or that you don’t think your are worthy of the authority it takes to make this type of suggestion.

A couple of other ways I’m sure you’ve heard this stated is:

* “This may sound silly, but……..”

{OR}

* “I don’t know if the group will want to go with this decision, but………”.

                Instead, focus on what you are trying to convey and say it with positive affirmation. Be confident in your statements and say things like:

* “My suggestion is this……..”

* “I Believe our best bet is to ………..”

* “Let’s try to make this work doing X, Y, Z as our method

                   If you’re already in the habit of starting off most of your suggestions with a negative tone, it may take some practice to stop yourself from doing so, but you most certainly CAN change this habit! Practice speaking with confidence and authority. Don’t shoot yourself in the foot before you even get started! Work diligently to clearly communicate your thoughts so that those you are speaking to feel the confidence you should be commanding as a leader.

Dr. Carmen April's Speaker Series

Dr. Carmen April’s Speaker Series

             Dr. Carmen April is a young entrepreneur and community leader recognized as a 2013 Nashville Business Journal Top 40 Under Forty Award Recipient and is a 2014 Graduate of the New Leaders Council Institute – Nashville Chapter.  Dr. April is available for speaking engagements on Leadership for College Students and Young Professionals.

You can follow her daily #Leadership insights on Twitter @DrCarmenApril

3 Ways to Make Forming New Habits Easier

3 Ways to

Make Forming New Habits Easier!

           Think of habits as your brain’s specialized Productivity Center! Habits are formed after an activity has been performed at least once and eventually become behavior that is automatic. Think about some of your daily habits such as getting up in the morning to brush your teeth, exercising around the same time everyday, and going to bed at a certain time every night, etc. The first time, or first couple of times, you perform a specific activity, it probably takes a bit of concentration, attention to detail, energy, and brain power to perform. However, once you start to perform any given activity over and over, the amount of mental effort you have to exert becomes less.

          There is a ton of science involved in explaining how our minds specifically form habits and is beyond what I am discussing here today. My focus in this post is discussing how forming new habits can lead to personal success for you!

If you want to change or “break” a habit, you have to find an alternative to that habit that offers the same reward (Tweet this).

           Let’s take smoking for example. It’s difficult for people to break the habit of smoking because there are not many healthy alternatives that excite that same area of the brain that nicotine from smoking does. Smoking and other habits are hard to break because they have become automatic for people to do them without thinking!

Here are 3 Suggestions to start changing your habits today:

1.) Start Small – Start small, with an alternative to the old habit, that is actually achievable. If you want to begin the habit of working out more often, start with just going to the gym or the park 1 day per week for 30 minutes. Do this repeatedly for a couple of weeks until it becomes a new habit, then increase the frequency and/or duration.

2.) Be committed to Repetition – Do you know someone who ALWAYS seems to misplace their keys? Whether it’s you (Yes, you!) or someone else you know, create a place such as a key ring holder on the wall that you place your keys on each and every single time you enter that given space ie – work, home, purse etc. When you come home and are tempted to simply throw the keys on the kitchen counter, resist and remind yourself that you are committed to changing your habit and take the couple of extra steps required to place them in the designated spot.

3.) Have a plan in place to pivot away from undesirable habits to more desirable habits no matter how many times it takes. Example: If you have formed the habit of starting your suggestions in business meetings in a negative tone, know that it is OK to stop in the middle of your sentence, pause for a second and say something like, “Let me start over……….”, immediately correcting that habit and beginning your statement with confidence.

What other suggestions do you have for helping to form new habits?

Dr. Carmen April's Speaker Series

Dr. Carmen April’s Speaker Series

                Dr. Carmen April is a young entrepreneur and community leader recognized as a 2013 Nashville Business Journal Top 40 Under Forty Award Recipient and is a 2014 Graduate of the New Leaders Council Institute – Nashville Chapter.  Dr. April is available for speaking engagements on Leadership for College Students and Young Professionals.

You can follow her daily #Leadership insights on Twitter @DrCarmenApril